Not Your Hero Read online

  “You sure about that?” I grip her ass and press her against my hard cock.

  She gasps and pushes away laughing. “One date, Sam. After that, we can see where this will go.”

  “Just one date until I can get into your pants? Why, Ms. Gallagher, you’re a bit easy.”

  “I didn’t say you’d get into my pants. I said that we’ll see. I really think we should talk about this. You’re my landlord, and I have Ben. I can’t risk this getting ugly. I need this place to live.”

  I’m pissed that she’d think so low of me. “Let me tell you this one time. Then I never want to talk about it again, okay?”

  “About what?”

  “I would never kick you and Ben out. And I’d never do anything to hurt him. I can’t promise I won’t upset you along the way, but I would die before I let anything bad happen to that kid.”

  “‘Kay,” she whispers.

  “‘Kay.” I lean down and brush my lips against hers. Sealing my fate.

  9

  Courtney

  AFTER MAKING MY LITTLE deal with Sam, I go to bed with a smile on my face. I’m not going to settle, but who wants to go through life alone? Not me. And I know it would be good with Sam. The potential of an ‘us’ makes my heart swell.

  “Mommy?”

  I sit up and turn my lamp on. “What’s wrong, baby?”

  “I had a bad dream.” Ben’s voice is choppy, and his fear breaks my heart.

  “Come on up.” I pat my bed and he jumps on, crawling under the covers to snuggle next to me.

  “What was the dream about?”

  He yawns. “There was a bad guy in the house. He was chasing me.”

  “Oh, honey. There’s nobody here.”

  “I know.”

  I rub his back, trying to soothe him as he catches his breath from the tears.

  “Mommy?”

  “Yes, Benjamin?”

  “I was scared ‘cause we don’t have a daddy, and I’m not big enough to save you if a bad guy comes.”

  In the silence that follows, I can hear my heart crack.

  “We’ll be okay.” I rub his back and turn my head so he can’t see how ashamed I am. It kills me that I can’t give him a dad. But what choice do I have? Take Matt to court to force him to see his son? With what money?

  “I bet Sam would help us,” he whispers as he falls asleep.

  “What?”

  “Sam would help us if there was a bad guy. Wouldn’t he?”

  “Yeah, honey.” I kiss his forehead. “Sam would help us.”

  * * *

  A typical Monday morning, I’m running around the house to get everything ready for the day. I forgot to make Ben’s lunch last night, so I throw random items into a lunch box, hoping the school doesn’t send home a note about how he didn’t have a balanced lunch . . . again.

  “Hurry up, Ben! We’re running late.” I tie my shoes as I hop to the door.

  “Okay! I’m ready.” He runs to the door and opens it for me, then yells, “Hi, Sam!”

  Crap. I’m a total mess right now, my hair is all ratty, and I’m not wearing any make-up. My plan was to drop Ben off and put my make-up on in the car before getting to the grocery store without actually having to have a conversation with someone. I quickly put my sunglasses on. At least that’ll help hide the bags under my eyes.

  “Hey, little dude.”

  “Can I play on your phone in the car, Mom?”

  “Sure. Here.” I hand it to him and he runs to the car.

  Sam stands in front of me and watches Ben get in the car before turning his focus to me. My throat becomes dry when he puts his fingers in the front waistband of my black work pants and pulls me close to him. He’s so masculine; he makes me feel like a teenager when he gives me attention.

  “Take your sunglasses off,” he says with his husky voice.

  “What? Why?” I laugh.

  “I want to see your eyes.”

  I’m embarrassed that I look like such crap, but whatever. He might as well get a good look at me like this now because this is how I look half the time anyway.

  “Okay.” I pull them off and tuck them in my back pocket.

  He leans closer and lowers his voice. “I’m sure you don’t want Ben to see me maul you, so you need to lean forward and kiss me.”

  “He’ll still see,” I answer, breathless already.

  “No, he won’t. I’m blocking you.”

  “I . . .”

  “Court, I’m hanging on by a thread here. I need you to grab my shirt and pull yourself up, so I can get a taste of you before you leave for the day. Or,” he tilts his head, “I can be the one to grab you, but I’m not sure I can control myself if I get my hands on you.”

  “Oh. Well, umm-”

  I take too long because his hands slide up from my waist to under my arms and lifts me so my face is level with his, toes an inch from the ground. Holy shit.

  “I’m an impatient man, babe. Fucking kiss me.”

  I try to make the kiss quick, friendly even, because my child is about ten feet away. Granted, all of his attention is on the game he’s playing on my phone, but still, he could look up any second.

  Sam bites on my upper lip, softly tugs, and then slides his tongue into my mouth. We both let out a moan, and after a minute, I pull back. He watches my face; his eyes roam over every inch, a kind of softness I’ve never seen from him, transporting this sexy man into one I could easily fall in love with. When he’s had his fill, he gently sets me down, then takes my bag and my hand, and walks me to the car.

  I think about that kiss all day. I messed up a couple of orders at the store and drove through a stop sign, but somehow, Ben and I made it home safe and in one piece.

  I’ve put Ben to bed and poured myself a glass of wine. I take out my folder of debts and pull the latest bill out.

  St. Mary’s Hospital. Eleven thousand four hundred twenty-two dollars and twelve cents.

  This is taking forever to pay off. The hospital worked out a payment plan with me, and I do what I can every month. I’ve cut the debt in half, but it seems like the minimum never goes down. I grab my checkbook out of my purse and write out a payment for one hundred and twenty-five dollars. That’s all I can do this month.

  My phone vibrates on the counter, and Mona’s smiling face illuminates the screen.

  “Hey,” I answer.

  “Why didn’t you tell me?” Her voice full of anger.

  “About what?”

  “Kevin.”

  I had hoped to avoid this conversation with her. I don’t want her to feel bad that the ‘nice’ guy she set me up with turned out to be anything but nice.

  “Mona. It’s not that big of a deal.” Kevin scared me, and if Sam hadn’t been there, I don’t know what would have happened. But I haven’t heard anything from Kevin.

  “Yes, it is!” she screeches.

  “How do you even know what happened?”

  “Kevin told me at work today.”

  “What did he say happened, exactly?” I grab my glass and curl my feet under me as I sit on the couch. My fingers twirl the turquoise ribbon on the throw pillow that covers the rip in the cushion.

  “I asked him how the date went, and he got this look on his face. I don’t even know how to describe it.”

  “Try.”

  “Regret, anger. I don’t know. He said he got really upset when you broke up with him.”

  “We weren’t even together for me to officially break up with him.”

  “I know. He said he was rude and mean, and he feels horrible.” Her voice is soft, sad.

  “He should. Sam came over and made him leave.”

  Through the receiver, metal clinks, and I can picture Mona tossing her bottle opener back in her drawer. “What?”

  “Kevin was yelling at me. Like, a switch flipped and he became this crazy person. He was so mad.”

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”

  “Don’t apologize for him. He’s a grown-a
ss man, and he’s responsible for his actions.”

  “I’m not making excuses for him, but he gave me some sob story about how both his ex-wife and his ex-fiancée cheated on him, and he has all these self-esteem issues now.”

  “Funny,” I laugh with no humor, “he forgot to mention that.”

  “Crap, Court. I’m never setting you up again. I feel like shit for not realizing how much of an ass he is.”

  I take a sip of wine. “Like I said, not your fault.”

  “So. Tell me about Sam coming to your rescue.”

  I lean back and replay the whole incident. Telling her how safe he made me feel, and what Ben said about him helping us. I include our new arrangement, and laugh when she tells me that I’m in love.

  “No, not love. But definitely lust.”

  “Who wouldn’t fall in love with their own personal hero.”

  Her words hit me hard. And for a moment, I wonder if what she said holds any merit. He fixes my stuff when it breaks, and he stuck up for me in front of Kevin. He’s saved me from the shitty decision I made to drive to the bar that night, and he’s amazing with Ben. “Yeah, I guess Sam is my hero, huh?”

  “Lucky bitch,” Mona jokes.

  “Love you, too.”

  “I’m really sorry that happened with Kevin.”

  “It’s over now.” I stretch and yawn. “I’m beat. I’ll call you tomorrow?”

  “Yeah. ‘Night.”

  “’Night.”

  When I toss my phone on the coffee table, it bounces off and I curse under my breath.

  “Not your hero, babe.”

  Sam’s deep voice startles me, and I jump a few feet. With a shaky hand to my heart, I stand to face him. God, he’s stunning. Black jeans that hang off his hips and a gray sweatshirt that zips. Still, he’s in my house, uninvited, at almost midnight.

  “Sam. What the hell? You scared the shit out of me! How did you get in here?”

  He walks closer and quirks an eyebrow. “Your back door was unlocked.”

  Shit, I must have forgotten to lock it after I took my garbage out. “Still. Couldn’t you have knocked?” Again, I look like shit. I’ve changed out of my work clothes and am wearing old flannel pajama bottoms and a ratty blue tank top.

  He stares at me for a moment, and the rapid beat of my heart slows. It’s then I recognize the look on his face. Jaw tight, brows pulled together. He’s mad.

  “What’s wrong?”

  He gives a slight shake of his head before running his hands down his face in frustration.

  “I came here to see you. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you all day.”

  That makes two of us. But for some reason, I don’t think I’m going to like what he says next. Making himself at home, he grabs a beer from the fridge and pauses at my kitchen counter. When I realize what he’s looking at, I run in and stuff the papers back in the folder, embarrassed that he saw my debt. His eyes assess me, and there’s something in the way he’s staring at me that’s making me nervous. I wonder if it would look trashy to chug the rest of the wine from the bottle.

  “I saw your light was still on and thought I’d come over. Maybe we’d hang out or something.”

  “Okay.” I sit at the kitchen table, using it as a shield.

  “Then I hear you on the phone saying I’m your hero.” I’m taken aback by the tone of his voice. It’s cold. “I don’t want that, Courtney. I said I wouldn’t sleep with anyone else. That’s it.”

  I choose my words cautiously because I can tell he’s fighting something inside by the tension in his body. “I know that.”

  “Then why the fuck are you making it more than it is?” he asks desperately.

  “I’m not.” I walk closer to him and grab his hand. “Look at me.”

  His jaw is set harder now, and I see the confusion twirling in his face. He’s angry with himself because he actually likes the idea of being someone’s hero. When he continues to stare into the empty living room, I tug on his hand. “Look at me, Sam. Talk to me.”

  He sets his beer on the counter and grabs my other hand, pulling me flush with his body. Every inch of him is hard against me, and the pulsating between my legs that happens just by looking at him starts to throb with need.

  “I don’t want to talk.” He walks me backward to the couch, and with a kind of gentleness that doesn’t match his mood, he lays me down.

  He grips my shirt at the bottom and bunches it up then unclasps my bra so my breasts fall out. His cool fingers massage my ribs and stomach. I watch him, fascinated, as his eyes follow his hands. When they reach my nipples, he circles them gently, alternating between the two, before leaning down and running his tongue over every millimeter.

  “Sam,” I moan, wanting more, but loving this tamer side of him.

  “You’re so pretty, Courtney. Every inch of you.” I wish he’d look in my eyes, but instead, he burns a trail over my body with his intense gaze. His hands grip my pants, and in one movement, I’m bared to him. I said I wouldn’t sleep with him again until we talked and went out on a date, but I don’t have much willpower right now.

  He runs a finger up my inner thigh and around to the other side. Then he does it again, each time getting closer to the place I need him to touch most. My thighs shake, and my palms are sweaty as I force myself to stay still so he can do whatever it is he needs to do. I want this to work between us, and what’s happening right now is huge. I don’t know why, but it is.

  His thumb presses on my clit, and in almost slow motion, he circles it. I let out an animalistic groan, and he chuckles. “You like that?”

  I can’t answer, but he must understand what I need because he removes his thumb. He spreads me open with both hands then uses his tongue to continue the tortuous circles.

  “God, Sam.” Beads of sweat form all over my body and he laughs a little before he inserts two fingers and sucks on my clit. That’s all it takes for me to explode. Never have I had this powerful of a reaction to someone. I grip his hair, holding his mouth where I need it to stay, and lift my hips, riding out the rest of my orgasm.

  I release the death grip I have on his hair, and his soft, wet lips trail kisses up my body. When he reaches my mouth, I willingly open for him, and he uses that same slow rhythm to fuck me there with his tongue. I sit up a little and try to stand. My intention is to get him naked and inside me, but his strong arms push me back down.

  “No,” he mumbles against my lips.

  I pull back and force him to look at me. “No, what?”

  “No more. I can’t.” He pushes off the couch and scrubs his face.

  “Can’t what?”

  “I can’t do this.” He looks up the staircase and steps closer to me, lowering his voice. “I don’t know how to be this guy, the one you think I can be.”

  My heart breaks for the man standing before me. He really is trying, and I love that about him. I remove the rest of my clothes and slowly walk the remaining steps to him. My hands move to his sweatshirt and unzip it. I run my nails along every divot on his muscular chest, loving the hair sprinkled throughout.

  I drop to my knees and grip his erection over his jeans. He hisses through his teeth when I pull him out and rub my finger in the drop of pre-cum. I enjoy teasing him, pumping slowly, licking every inch, and massaging his heavy sac. He doesn’t say a word, just brushes my hair to one side, and holds it with one hand while he uses the fingers of the other to trace along the side of my face and over my lips when they’re not in use.

  I surprise him by sucking on his thick head, and his knees buckle. “Fuck that feels good,” he whispers harshly before sitting on the couch. I turn my body to get a better angle and take him as far as I can go. My hand grips where my mouth can’t fit, and I increase my pace with every pump, sucking like my life depends on it. I want this to be as amazing for him as it was for me.

  He groans and thrusts his hips up. Knowing that I’m pleasuring him and making him feel like this makes me even hotter. I squeeze m
y legs together, trying to alleviate some of the pressure, but it’s no use.

  Sensing my frustration, he pulls me off him and lays on the couch. With a wicked gleam in his eyes, he says, “Climb on.” I waste no time and straddle his hard dick, ready to sink onto him. He swiftly turns me around so I’m straddling his face and slams a finger inside me.

  “Oh, hell.” I lean down and pump him with the same pace he’s finger fucking me, adding my mouth so I don’t scream.

  He uses the other hand and presses in hard, fast circles on my clit. Just when I’m about to explode again, his fingers vanish, and he pulls me down to his mouth. My entire body convulses and the rumble of his groans vibrating against my already swollen clit make my thighs jerk. His salty cum coats my throat, and I lick the last drop from my lips when he pulls himself out of my mouth.

  Our bodies become limp, and I have enough sense to slide down and turn around. We both groan when my wet pussy rubs against his still hard dick and we move our hips, getting every last ounce of pleasure before it fades away.

  Eventually, our breathing evens out, and the feel of his hands running down my back, over my butt, and back up again, lulls me to sleep.

  10

  Sam

  I WAS ONLY ABLE to drift off for a little bit tonight, which is highly unusual for me. Holding Courtney while she sleeps gives me a kind of fulfillment I’ve been missing. I should have had sex with her again, taken advantage of the opportunity, but something in her eyes made me want to respect her ‘no sex until after the first date’ rule. Sixty-nine action was fucking amazing, though. We’ll definitely have to do that again.

  I’m still on my back, but she’s rolled to her side, somehow wedging herself between me and the back of the couch. She kicked off the blanket I covered her with, one leg over both of mine, and her arms holding me tight. Both of mine are around her, and as much as I think I should, I can’t let her go.

  My eyes are becoming heavy again when I hear the toilet flush. It takes me a second to realize Ben is awake.

  I jump off the couch and get dressed in under ten seconds. With her clothes in one hand, I throw them in her direction and accidentally hit her in the face with her pants. She stirs a little bit, and I chuckle before grabbing her shoulders and giving them a shake.